Watching
by Come Lady Death
Summary: Ford watches Teyla and does some thinking. One-sided Teyla/Ford, for Valentine's Day even though it's more depressing than romantic. R&R.


Aiden Ford flushed when he realized that he was staring across the mess hall at Teyla Emmagan. Again. The young soldier, eating lunch alone, couldn't seem to keep his eyes off the Athosian woman. She was in the lunch line with Sheppard and McKay, her hair falling over one eye as she laughed at something Rodney told her. Her dark eyes found Aiden and she smiled at him. Ford ducked his head in embarrassment and concentrated on his food again.

Why couldn't he stop staring at her? Okay, she was attractive. More than attractive, she was hot. Aiden shook his head and forced himself to eat another spoonful of soup. Hot was not the word for Teyla. Hot seemed to denote a cheaper, more flashy kind of beauty. Teyla's was a fierce, quiet prettiness that was more subtly forceful than in-your-face gorgeous. But whatever label you stuck on her, her appeal was undeniable.

But it wasn't just her looks that drew Aiden in and made him want to know her. It was her presence. The self-assured way she moved and spoke, the self-confidence that poured from her in reassuring waves. Ford guessed that it came of being the leader of her people: Teyla was used to having people look up to her and she had learned to look and act like she knew what would happen even if she was just as scared as the rest of them. She was reassuring and he felt safe around her, even when he was the one protecting her.

Aiden sighed and tried in vain to nip his hopeless thoughts in the bud. He wasn't sure why, but he felt that Teyla was always going to be out of his reach. He was an adult, a trained soldier in the USAF. He was respected for his knowledge and experience and he knew that. Aside from the obvious ranks, he knew that everyone on their team had an equal voice. His opinion was respected just as much as Dr. McKay's, or Sheppard's, or Teyla's. He was the youngest member of the team, though. And sometimes he wondered what the others thought.

He wondered what Teyla Emmagan thought of when she looked at him. Did she see him as an equal warrior? Or as a kid holding a gun? He knew she looked on him as a good friend and she respected him as such, but did she see his age when she saw him? Or did she see to the man inside? Aiden felt inferior to Teyla in a way that he couldn't begin to comprehend. She was nice, he was nice. She was smart, he was smart. They liked each others' company. They were both attractive and the age gap wasn't that big. So why did he feel that she was so unattainable?

Ford blinked and realized that as his mind had wandered to Teyla, so had his eyes. He was back to staring at her idly and when he came to himself, he saw that she was staring back. They were at the end of the line now and looking for a place to sit. His face burned and he wondered how long she'd been noticing his eyes on her. His gaze flicked back to his now cold soup, but it was too late. She was already making her way over and beckoning Sheppard and McKay to follow.

"May we join you?" she asked before sliding into the seat across from him. Aiden kept his eyes down, not trusting himself to look at her without saying something stupid. He knew he was acting stupid. He wasn't a twelve year old with a silly crush on his teacher, for heaven's sake, he was a grown man with an attraction to a female team mate.

He blinked, the force of that thought hitting him like a Wraith stunner. Wow. He'd never really thought of it that way before, but he definitely liked Teyla. This wasn't an idle crush, it was a real, deep attraction, at least on his part. Aiden didn't know what to make of that. Love on the team was one thing, unrequited love on the team could have serious issues that could compromise them off-world and-

"-and then McKay and I fought to the death for Teyla's hand," Sheppard was saying, a smile tugging at his mouth as he watched Ford come back from wherever his thoughts had gone. Ford registered what he was saying and tipped his head to one side, not understanding. They all laughed at his confusion. "You back from beyond?" John asked him. "You seemed a little distracted there."

He looked up at Teyla Emmagan. He watched her face flow into the easy, friendly smile she always gave him, watched her eyes dance in amusement at his being lost in thought, watched her slender hands bat her long hair away from her shoulders. He said, "Sorry, Colonel. Just a bit distracted." Distracted was all he'd ever be, and watch was all he'd ever do. Aiden knew he couldn't be what Teyla needed, no matter how much he wanted to be the one. So he watched and he wished, but he never moved.


End file.
